My god this sucks, this is the third time I’ve written this frickin entry today. One more and I give up. This sucks so much.

Well this is a much more angry version of the entry, but hopefully I’ll calm down some. This user barking in my ear isn’t helping matters either

[rizzn takes several deep breaths]

Well, I think this was the paragraph where I talked about my birthday being Sunday. I’m 21 and I’m finally legal and stuff. I’m probably, well, no probably, I am spending that weekend with my parents.

Great, I’m trying to type here and all the credit cards for the entire company go down. Sheesh, I’ll be back in a second.

Finally cleared out the queue.

What’s funny is that a year ago, almost exactly, I was totally straight edge. And I got converted to the dark side after I lost the best job of my life to corporate bulldrek, when my two homies, Crackbaby and Lumpy told me to close my eyes, and stick out my tongue. Paper.

It began a short downward spiral in my life, but once that got in check, I’ve had few regrets. For one, I’m glad I waited till I was outta my parents house. But my entertainment doesn’t put me in the poorhouse, I’m not addicted, and so I’m generally ok with it. Sure it clashes with my beliefs, but after a year, I still have not reconciled it with myself yet, but pretty much I’m ok.

The only thing I regret was starting smoking. Not because its a nasty habit, or that it’s expensive or anything like that, but because my parents sheltered me from smoking my whole life, and and I still chose to smoke. I mean my dad quit for me, my grandpa did, no one was allowed to smoke near me, horrible that I’m smoking now.

Gahh, too many calls from stupid people. It’s a fricking computer store chain, can’t you people figure it out yourselves?

Well, I’m getting tired of writing the same stuff over and over again, I’ve written this same entry three times now, so I’m going to take a smoke break.

Please email me, I’m very lonely up here at work.

“The foremost concern of a warrior, no matter what his rank, is how he will behave at the moment of his death. No matter how eloquent and intelligent you may normally seem to be, if you lose composure on the brink of death and die in an unseemly manner, you previous good conduct will all be in vain, and you will be looked down upon by serious people. This is a very disgraceful thing.”