Dear Diary,

I was on the floor today at work in front of the copy machine. Why was I on the floor? WEll, our jicky little printer/copier I was using for copying like 700 pages for a code review on our ringtone site is a POS, and requires someone to hold up the paper so it doesen’t jam.

Luckily, I’m an inventive individual, and I got a plastic knife to replace me. I downsized myself.

At any rate, the point of me bringing up me being on the floor is that it reminded me once of when I was a kid, and we were at Foley’s department store, and my mom was trying on clothes in the women’s dressing room, and I was on the floor outside of it waiting for her. I looked into the dressing room area just as this lady with a short skirt and black panty hose or stockings or something walks out and points at me scoldingly and says “I saw that!” and walks off hastily.

I remember feeling so bad because I wasn’t really looking up her skirt. And I told my mom that a lady told me I was looking up her skirt and I really wasn’t, and she told me not to worry about it. I didn’t feel so bad about it then.

There is this Russian chick who works in the office across from mine who’s skirt I’d like to look up, but she’d probably catch me, and I’d have to tell my mom to recieve absolution.

Hey Malk, haven’t you been listening to what the Democrats have to say about Ralph Nader?

“A vote for Nader is a vote for Bush.”

I’ve already stated that I was going to vote for the hulk, however in all seriousness, I’ll probably vote for Bush, and let me tell you why.

Unfortunately, it’s the only vote that makes sense. If I vote for Gore, I might as well stab myself in my cock because in undoubtably would result in the death of the internet. His policies on control of the internet make 1984 look like a toy poodle compared to the werewolf he would impliment. Anyone who believes as much of his own propaganda as the Goremeister is about as delusional as … well, Bill Clinton.

Ralph Nader? Well, his economic politics are just plain absurd, and would also hurt our service based economy horribly. If it were up to Nader, we’d be an isolationist 2nd world nation. Sure, he’s got some good ideas. I won’t even get into that drug thing… well, okay, I will.

But not now.

Buchanon is the only fellow that is the perfect match for me in office. He’s not nearly as horrible as the media makes him out to be. He was just an easy target in the 1996 elections, what with it being all trendy to bash the Christian Coalition (one of his bigger supporters of the time) and everthing. Econimically, he’s got a few bad ideas (i.e. removal from nafta and wto … but for very good reasons), and his conspiracy theories are based on the same facts mine are based on, and he comes to the same conclusions. And that’s the main reason why he won’t ever be elected. Is because he talks about them openly and they are public knowledge.

But then that delves into my conspiracy theories.

Which I will talk about some other time (gee, I’ve been promising that for what 11 months now?)

Basically, I won’t vote for Buchanon because I know he won’t get elected. He’s not going to magically come up with 57% of the popular vote in a few days here.

Bush, he’s the one to do the least amount of damage in office. He hasn’t done bad at all for our state. Whole hell of a lot better of a governer than that pill-popping stupid wench we had before him. (Ann Richards, for you people who aren’t familiar with Texas Politics).

Texas has done much better with Bush as governor. Of course, governors do as much for state affairs as, well, presidents do for national affairs. Which is about nothing.

I mean really, all we are voting for here is a figurehead. Which president is likely to least appear like an ass on international platforms. Figure that question out and you find out who you can vote for.

Or you can vote your conscience.

Or you can vote for Hulk Hogan.

(considers that thought for a good 15 minutes)


Quote of the Entry: “Very interesting, not far into the movie a woman that this guy was copulating with turned into a spider and when he escaped there were great knashing teeth where her snatch should have been.”
– uzume
(ed: NO NO NO!)

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