Dear Diary…

I found this on the internet (the one that al gore made up)…

Strange but True:

According to the Constitution, the Speaker of the House of Representatives is to be offered the job of President if the Electoral College is unable to pick a winner before January 20, 2001. Some have speculated that Dennis Hastert (R-IL) would be unwilling to give up the Speakership for a temporary stint as President. After all, why would anyone want to trade a multi-year tenure as the third most powerful man in America for no more than a few weeks in the Oval Office?

If the House Speaker refuses to become President, the next in line behind him, according to the Constitution, is the longest-serving member of the majority party in the U.S. Senate. In this case, that person is 98-year old Republican Senator Strom Thurmond from South Carolina. After seeking the White House in the usual way in 1948, Thurmond may now become President as the result of the closest national election in history. Sure, it’s an unlikely scenario, but it’s possible.

One has to wonder if Strom Thurmond gets butterflies whenever he ponders the fact that he could actually become President, even if just for a little while. Even more interesting would be knowing what he would do if given the opportunity. Think about it, at 98 years of age, Strom Thurmond doesn’t need to be concerned about how his agenda as President will be received by voters. Instead, he is probably more concerned about how his agenda will be received in Heaven.

Senator Thurmond is arguably one of the most conservative politicians ever to serve in Congress. Therefore, it is entirely possible that President Thurmond would be the most conservative Chief Executive to ever occupy the White House.

Consider the possibilities…

With the stroke of a pen, President Thurmond could write into law any public policy he wishes, so long as a two-thirds majority in Congress does not vote to override him. On Thurmond’s first day in office, he could conceivably write Executive Orders to accomplish the following:

Eliminate unconstitutional taxes (like the income tax, the capital gains tax, the death tax, the gift tax, the Social Security tax)

Enact tariffs on foreign goods to pay for the legitimate needs of government

Enact an outright ban on homosexuals in the military

End all federal funding for abortion at home and abroad

Declare all human beings to be “persons” from the moment of conception (thereby criminalizing all abortions)

Eliminate the grossly immoral National Endowment for the Arts

Close the failed federal Department of Education

Restore a U.S. military presence in the Panama Canal.

To compliment his own conservative influence in Washington, Thurmond could appoint the most conservative administration in U.S. history. To illustrate, the staff at have put together a list of “top prospects” for cabinet positions and other nominations in a Thurmond administration. They are listed below for your thoughtful consideration:

Now that’s funny!


Quote of the Entry: “Day 12 in the Banana Republic…”
– crackbaby

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