I was doing an ego-search just before going to bed tonight, and saw a post on a forum forewarning of all this crap that went down a couple weeks ago on the M&Dshow.

I must say, I’m still a bit hurt by the duplicity of people just a few scant weeks ago I called friends.  I could go to the trouble to dig through my logs (I saved everything from this whole exchange), and post detailed apologetics as to why I am the good guy and all that rot, but why bother?  I mean, everyones’ mind was made up from the get go .. judging by the dates on some of the replies to unrelated posts on that same board, there was growing animosity towards me already.

Truly, I had sensed it coming for a little while.  One individual with whom I worked closely at the station essentially has taken credit for a lot of my accomplishments already, while another has gone from one of my biggest fans to one of my most vocal opponents there at the station.  You’d think I raped a kitty or something.

I’m a principaled person, but I’m also a joker at heart.  Pile on top of this my penchant for practical jokes and my genuine but completely unintentional poker face, and you have a recipe for disaster.  When someone doesn’t ‘get me,’ they really don’t ‘get me.’

I’m going to be completely honest about something: I had a very legitimate point I was trying to make, and I’m of the opinion, when there is a greater principal at stake, or something is a matter of pride, one shouldn’t falter on one’s position.  I was simply doing that.

We’re not talking about the “gay debate,” in case some of you are confused.  We’re talking about the herd mentality.  If you read that exceedingly long article a little ways down this page, and the other exceedingly-but-not-quite-as-long article a bit further still down the page, you might get a hint at what I’m trying to say. 

I’m not downing any person specifically with my original statement.

I was simply pointing out that in a group of educated and (although self-proclaimed)enlightened people, one should be aware of where one’s influences are coming from.  Theoretically, one’s primary influence should be fact and reason, followed by morality, heart, family, and then society.

Unfortunately, this is contrary to the way our animal-like brains are built… Why else do you think the most effective advertising uses Jerry Springer tactics or simply some scantily clad chicas?  Because this appeals to EVERYONE at a very base level.

It is our job as humans (supposing we don’t want the world to end in cacophany and disorder) to rise above our animalistic natures.  Certainly, a master of his own nature isn’t above occasionally jerking the leash of other’s animalistic natures, as I was so doing throughout the whole affair — but if people paid attention to the direction I was gently tugging them towards instead of the fact I was tugging a bit, they might have caught on to the fact that my intentions were altogether altruistic from the beginning.

Unfortunately, however, I fell victim to a number of unfortunate circumstances that I more or less created for myself.  The people that I was trying to manipulate into realizing their own intelligence were the same people who knew all my party tricks. Furthermore, I was in a weakened state of mind due to a horrendous chest cold and above average fevers.  Additionally, I was perturbed to begin with due to internal politics at the station, and my ruling perception was that kind, gentle suggestions were become ineffective, and harsher words were also falling on deaf ears.

All of this to say, I’m very sad to see the AKA crew go, but as in all major changes in life, I’m already beginning to see the positive effects of this on my life, as well as why it is a good thing for me that I have now seperated myself from this crew. 

I would detail these reasons here, but for the fact that I’m uber-tired, and I undoubtably would be labeled as condenscending if I were to simply utter them (much as I consider another individual’s pity for the fact “that I must live my life” condenscending in the highest order).

So, in other words, good night.

/rizzn