Yes, thats right, boys and girls. I’m in Chicago. I needed to get away from things. I have a lot on the old noodle, if you know what I mean. I’ll be here until Sunday, and it is now Tuesday morning. One day under my belt already, and I’m not dead yet, so all is well.

You’re probably asking yourself, “Why isn’t Smokehouse using his own blog?”

Well, my blog is down for the forseeable future. I had a lot of trackback spam problems, and a remodel is in order. Perhaps I shall call Ikea. I know they handle all of Mark’s remodeling needs, amd maybe they do blogs, too.

But seriously, I told Mark I would be in the Windy City for a week, and that I certainly needed to blog about it. And when you’re The Most Powerful Man In Internet Radio like yours truly, Mark had no choice but to say “Mi blog es su blog.” Ah..one of the all too few joys of being me. All must yeild under my might.

As always, Monday, as is the first day of any vacation, was largely uneventful. It was mostly about getting here. Now, anybody who says “Getting there is half the fun”, is often full of shit. They havent traveled with my neice and nephew, who are 4 and 8, respectively. They are good kids and all, but after spending a week with them, I’ve had all the Cartoon Network and Toontown I can stand. Whoever came up with the idea of putting DVD players in cars needs to die a slow, painful death. I need a serious break from Sponge Bob, OK? You know how we entertained ourselves on car trips when I was a kid? We READ BOOKS and listened to our Walkmans, and we liked it! More than that, it was quiet and serene for God’s sake.

I got to Aurora by about 3:30 PM Monday and hung out with my sister for a couple hours, which was cool. More importantly, I gave her her kids back, but I’m digressing. We had some nachos and made fun of our parents, the complete trainwrecks that they are. They decided to come up this way as well, and stay at their time share condo. My dad forgot to bring his suitcase, so he had to go to Wal-Mart to buy clothes. At this point, I am contemplating mercy killings.

Soon enough, however, My friend Bryan, a Chicago firefighter, arrived to pick me up and save me from the madness that was sure to ensue. Notice at no point did I mention anything about hilarity.

Bryan just moved back into the city from some crap suburb called Lake in the Hills. This is a pretty nice place he has here. I’m rather enjoying it, despite the fact I’m working on about 3 hours sleep.

Anyway, we got back here and had a couple beers, and then we went to this little sports bar, Morretti’s, I think it’s called, for some pizza. The meal was great, but, man was it expensive. The Pizza and four beers between us was $48 with tip. I’m going to be here six days, and I can tell already that this is going to get pricey.

So we finished our meal, and the bartender/waitress called us “quitters” because we didnt stay for drinks. Silly little girl. The last time I was in Chicago and somebody challenged my drinking skills, I left them passed out in the back of Bryan’s car. Just because I’m not from the big city, that doesn’t mean I can’t whup your ass.

Got back here, had a couple more beers, and watched “The 40 Year Old Virgin”. I hadn’t seen it before, and I thought it was pretty funny. But the whole time I just found myself thinking, “Hang in there Jon. It’ll be okay, little buckeroo.”

(Oh, come on. I’ve gone this far without picking on anybody. I was due!)

That pretty much sums up Monday. I was lucky enough to find an open wireless connection, and my buddy has DSL, so I should be good for the week. I’ll try to start snapping some pictures. Probably wouldnt hrut me to try and get some more sleep either. Tuesday morning is now uopn me, and we’re going to a Chicago Cubs game. Its a good thing I packed my spare liver, because nobody really goes to Wrigley Field to watch baseball. The Cubs my look like a baseball team, but just because they have matching hats and try to hit a ball with a stick, it doesn’t make it so.

Rock.

MONDAY DRINK COUNT: 6 TRIP TOTAL: 6